Gold Coast Barbies are not what they seem

When the student is ready the teacher will appear

“Hello beautiful!” Michelle radiated confidence and positivity that I mistook for gimmicky customer service and sales. “I’m not beautiful. Good sales trick but I’m not fooled by your flattery,” I thought as a I shyly said hello and hid self consciously behind the props I was holding.

I couldn’t sign in quickly enough, get to my spot of least visibility to others and try to get my session in and ticked off my to do list.

“What would she know anyway? She has the perfect life. She’s young, good looking, healthy and has an awesome career. She wouldn’t know what it’s like for me.”

I believed that I was alone in my suffering and this points back to low self esteem and lack of confidence. The idea that I was less capable and less worthy than others sat in between me and others, keeping me separated and disconnected.

Michelle and Clare were the perfect teachers for me because they completely blew up any logic that I had bought into about happy, successful people not knowing suffering. The stereotype that I pigeon holed them into (Gold Coast Barbies) was completely disproved along with many other limiting beliefs I was buried under.

Eventually I recognised that the pessimism and pigeon holing I directed towards them was a reflection of the pessimism and pigeon holing I imprisoned myself with. Then after some more time came the realisation that the awe, bliss, inspiration and contentment I experienced from practicing Yoga existed within me, not just my teachers. My teachers guided me and illuminated those qualities of mine and they were always right there, in me. Teacher, student, there is no difference.

Essence of Living Yoga Retreat 2011, Byron Bay NSW.

Essence of Living Yoga Retreat 2011, Byron Bay NSW.

Eveline YoungComment